Raising Resilient Children: Talking to Kids About Antisemitism and World Events

Children are not shielded from the news — they pick it up from parents, classmates, and overheard conversations. What they need most is a trusted adult who knows what to say. A nine-year-old asks why her classmate told her that Jewish people are bad. A twelve-year-old sees something disturbing on TikTok and doesn't mention it to his parents, carrying it silently for days. A fifteen-year-old stops wearing her Star of David necklace to school without explaining why. Across the Jewish world, parents are navigating conversations they hoped they would never have to have — or at least not so soon.

Child development research offers both reassurance and guidance. Children are more resilient than we often fear, and they are more perceptive than we often realise. What makes the difference — overwhelmingly — is the quality of communication with the trusted adults in their lives. This article draws on developmental psychology, trauma-informed practice, and the experience of educators and mental health professionals working with Jewish children and families.

What Children Actually Know (and Don't Know)

The starting point is a realistic assessment of what children are actually being exposed to. Research by the American Psychological Association on children and media found that even young children who are not directly shown news content absorb emotional information from the adults around them — through overheard conversations, visible distress, changed routines, and the general emotional atmosphere of the home. Children who appear oblivious often are not. This means that parental attempts to 'protect' children by not discussing what is happening may paradoxically increase anxiety. Children who sense that something important is being concealed tend to fill the information gap with imagination — and imagination, particularly in children already exposed to frightening imagery, typically produces something worse than reality. Research by Professor Robyn Fivush at Emory University on family narrative and resilience found that children whose families talked openly about difficult events, including traumatic ones, showed significantly better long-term emotional adjustment than those whose families avoided discussion. "When parents are visibly distressed but silent, children don't conclude that everything is fine. They conclude that whatever is happening is too terrible to name."